It’s spring. It’s time to plant trees.
I want to plant a tree in our garden. Dad and Mum are very happy. They like green. Dad helps me plant the tree. First, we dig the soil. Then I put a little tree into the soil. Next I water it. I am so excited and I wait for the tree to grow. Two weeks later, my tree has some little leaves. I water it every day. Now it has lots of leaves. It grows fast. We should plant more trees. They make our world beautiful.
【要領(lǐng)點(diǎn)評(píng)】
小作者寫(xiě)了一次植樹(shù)的經(jīng)歷，但他并沒(méi)有單純拘泥于植樹(shù)的過(guò)程。既有過(guò)程，也有感覺(jué)，能使文章打動(dòng)讀者，給人以啟發(fā)。作文的最后一段就非常好，兩句話勝似千言萬(wàn)語(yǔ)。我們可以學(xué)習(xí)一下這種寫(xiě)法。 既描述過(guò)程，又適時(shí)提自己的看法或想法的寫(xiě)法，在作文中叫做“夾敘夾議”,描述過(guò)程為了提出一種思想服務(wù)，提出看法或想法使原本平實(shí)的描述有了意義。我們?cè)谝院蟮膶?xiě)作中也可以試一試。